2.16.18 Out Of Some Darkness

On this quiet dark February day, I slowly come out of some darkness, of some 40 years, as I gather to me a village.
Of those who knew , in ways different than I did. 
Of those who care, and will listen, hold my hand and cry their own tears. 
Of those who will stand by me, as I struggle and move down this sad tough path.

I gather to me those who surprise me with offers. 
With insight that makes me weep.
With suggestions that bring a smile, gratitude.

Here in this place, where I sequestered myself for my own, now I go Village.
Now I seek conversation. Understanding. Theirs, and my own.

Here in this place, I am not alone, trying to piece together who on earth they were.
Why on earth they did what they did.

It’s not just about drama or shock .
There is great perpetuated harm.
There is how they ‘presented as simplicity, transparency, responsibility, and goodness—straight-up and straightforward. Not so.’

Here in this place, it is about embraces. It is about the wonder and balm of compassion. It is about loving intent, grief for what has been lost . And profound ,honest love.

As we all slowly unpack the truth.

As I look forward to when I can lay them to rest.

And, my own, and my self, be set free.