1.10.16 We ran out of toilet paper.

      I mean, it was a bit of a tough week , and in tough weeks , the tough stuff takes up so much room, you are lucky if you eat and brush your teeth and don't smell too much and pull off the things most important to do . So we did what we all do.

We reverted to Kleenex, and each of us kept coming home and saying 'Crap! I forgot to get toilet paper !'

     We ran out of tissues and broke out the paper napkins kept there for holidays and stuff , kept forgetting again and again .

     But we're not spring chickens .... we get it. A bit of overload. Just relax . Let go of mess ups and confusions and mistakes and petty conflicts and just cool out. Do the best you can. 

     We were getting close to the end of the napkins , as I dropped him off at his Sam appointment. 

     I forgot as I picked him up and he left me there to trade sessions. 

But hey , when he arrived to get me , Ta da!!! I was like 'Wow! You remembered!' Hugging him , as he sat there behind the steering wheel , pleased beyond measure.

     What's so funny is how thick and fast and busy life was for so many years with all the kids and needs and homework and projects and social complexity and tutors and lessons and teams and all . 

So funny to me how beautiful it all is , and wearing . We aren't infinite and these gorgeous choices and events wear us out . Use us up a bit .

     So , we find ourselves going down the road of our lives, and eventually it both takes less to bring us to our knees, and less to induce great and good embracing and laughter and celebration .

1.10.16 Today.

1.10.16 Just a moment

Went by the river, stood on the banks, as the thick fog swirled and the waters coursed by and a small blue opening appeared overhead , just for that small moment .

 

1.10.16 Warm winter day

What a beautiful rainy foggy melting thawing warm winter day.

1.10.16 The gatherer or the gathered

There is this perverse illusion in our culture ,that beauty is an accomplishment. That if you are born beautiful , you have somehow done a good job. Soon , you learn that you are a commodity. To have and to hold . To use and collect and gather. Those who know nothing of these things , who never notice these things, participate without a thought to the impact upon their lives, no matter if they are the gatherer or the gathered.

 

1.10.16 Not stopping for anyone

I was wiping my streaming face with soaked hands, as I kalumphed down the thawing farmer's road, the air mild, the fog low lying upon the ground all about us, flowing past like a white elusive stream. He dug after gophers and raced through puddles and we must have narrowly missed a horse because there were the tracks, right there and fresh , as I shivered with relief, looking across the broad expanse of sleeping fields , through the woods to the river, all grey and powerful, not stopping for anyone.